We don’t give enough credit to the people we like. We go around looking for that one true love, that one true hallmark moment, that one true soul mate. The one true is a fallacy that we all buy into, actively promote, buy chocolate and wine for, sleep at night dreaming of while hugging our pillow. All this while the people we like stand around filling in the blanks. We think it’s for the meantime. We think this is until I find the one.
This is until this is replaced.
Like is such an underrated emotion. It does not lead to turmoil. No one you like will ever break your heart. No one you like will make you feel like you are mad. No one you like will turn you into an emotional junkie looking for the next hit of endorphins (unless you exercise with the one you like, pun intended.)
Why then do we not give like a chance?
We wait and obsess and wait some more and question our taste in men and our self worth and wear shoes too tight and dresses too small and lipsticks too red – all this to turn into a bird of paradise for someone’s idea of it.
Have you ever sat back and thought what is your idea of paradise?
Mine is talking. And eating. And fucking. In fact, everyone’s is. We all do everything we do for these primal needs, Maslow’s interpretation be damned. No relationship needs anything more.
Now, if you do agree with this, take a moment to figure out the opportunity cost of the years you have wasted with people you love, trying to talk to them, or listen to them or even figure out what you both want to have for dinner. And compare it to the excruciatingly fun times you have spent with people you like hanging out with and were not looking for a happy ending with.
Listen, forever is really long when you’re not having fun.
Find someone you like. Find someone who likes you. Forget about everything else. Get your standards up.